Five Things your Parents Wish you Knew about Borrowing Money From Them

This baby is one month old.

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Hey kids, tweens, teens and young adults, there are things your parents wish you knew when you borrow money from them.  There may even be some kids still asking for money from family in their 30’s, 40’s and 50’s.  That’s sad but you need to hear this too.

So as a parent I’m nominating myself as spokesman for all parents worldwide.  We want you to know what goes through our thoughts and feelings when the inevitable question comes up, CAN I BORROW SOME MONEY?

  1. As your lender, we want to be repaid.  We worked hard for the little cash we have to lend and we’d like to get it back during this lifetime (ours, not yours).  We are not so concerned with earning interest on the loan but we do want the principal back.
  2. Our retirement may hinge on your promise to pay.  How do you feel about us moving in when we get old and you have to change OUR diapers?  Payback the loan quickly please.
  3. We have a very difficult time taking the emotion out of the lending equation.  We might know that the purpose for borrowing is sketchy, the likelihood of repayment is low and you are borrowing over your head.   But we can’t get past the fact that you are a blood relative and we spoon fed you pureed peas and carrots long ago.  You have an strategic advantage here that we don’t want to be exploited.
  4. We want you to grow into a responsible citizen.  We hope to see you build trust by fulfilling your promise to repay the loan.  The footprints you make with this loan will be the trail head of your financial legacy.
  5. We want you to stand on your own two financial feet and stop feeding at the trough of Mom and Dad’s Gravy Farm.  You’ll have to do it because we are generally too weak-kneed to tell you no.

So we’d rather not have to respond to the loan request.  We’d like you to call just to say hello sometimes.  If you only call when you need something we might become more active call screeners.  We want our relationship to be more than just about money.  We crave something deeper and more meaningful.

For more information on borrowing from family go to The Wall Street Journal article about borrowing from family and the pitfalls from those micro loans.

Parents, did I paint an accurate picture?  What else would you like to tell the kids about borrowing money from you?  Kids, what would you like to tell your parents?  Leave a comment please.


About Michael Shelton

Your Business Coach Facilitating Delegation and Work Group Engagement Michael Shelton has over twenty-five years of business and military accomplishments, including extensive experience with one of the largest, publicly traded real estate investment trusts (REIT). He is a qualified business coach with assignments in cross-functional work group management, strategic planning, unit leadership, joint venture acquisitions, executive education, mentoring, training and merger integration. Michael has accumulated best practices for building committed work groups from more than $4 billion of capital markets transactions and commercial property development. He served as a commissioned officer and helicopter pilot in the U.S. Army, and earned his MBA from The University of Arizona. Michael has served as a major conference panelist and is the author of Cash Flow Rich, Winning Ways to Evaluate and Finance Real Estate. Today, he helps business owners get more work group engagement as President and CEO of Shelton Business Services, LLC in Scottsdale, Arizona. Disclaimer: I don't offer investment, legal or tax advice. Talk to your broker, accountant or lawyer for investment, tax and legal help. I might own stock in the companies I mention on-line. My posts, tweets and other on-line activity are my personal thoughts and don't represent my employer or company.
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